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All in the Family
The cast of Family Guy bonds over bon mots.
In the olden days, episodes of Family Guy—the outrageous animated Fox sitcom that was canceled, then brought back thanks to DVD sales and syndication success—were recorded with the entire voiceover cast in tow. It took a lot longer than today’s system, which typically utilizes only one actor at a time. Therefore, the Family Guy Live event Saturday 15 at the Chicago Theatre—where the cast will do live readings of episodes and answer audience questions—is a rare chance for the entire family to regroup for the sake of fans and cast alike. We wrangled four of them and, starting with the Chicago native of the bunch, had them supply their own interview question to start off the next victim. Upon hearing the format, the cast let out a collective, “Oh, shit.”
Alex Borstein (Lois Griffin)
I see that you grew up in Deerfield. Were you big into Chicago improv?
Oh, no. Most people assume that. They’re like, were you Second City or [iO]? But really, my start in comedy was Passover. That’s really every Jewish kid’s first performance. You’ve got at least 12 people around a giant table and you’ve got a script in front of you [a Haggadah]. It’s the first time you start playing with voices and trying to make it interesting. Because you’re doing the same damn text every year. So that was my start. Singing the four questions.
Did your parents get frustrated?
No, my folks encouraged it. I started at a very young age referring to God as a she. You know, “Holy be She.” Everyone used to laugh. Now, I’m still doing it and it’s annoying. [My family] is kinda like, “All right! Maybe you’re the same height but it’s no longer cute.”
Did you always find the afikoman [matzo that’s hidden on Passover]?
I was pretty good. My dad was lazy, so he would hide it in the M volume of the encyclopedia. Under matzo. I was the only one who cared; my brothers didn’t think it was worth a dollar.
Mila Kunis (Meg Griffin)
So Alex Borstein wants me to say that you deserve an Oscar for your work on Santa with Muscles.
Oh, I hate her. I don’t see why she has to compare me to Santa with Muscles when she did Catwoman. I did it when I was ten years old. I played an orphan, and Hulk Hogan played Santa Claus. And nothing else much happens, except…Hulk Hogan was Santa Claus. Everybody always makes fun of me. There’s one other movie I did that if Alex were to find it, she’d have such material. But I pray she never finds it.
You gonna tell me?
No. No, no, no, no, no.
SWM got a 1.9 out of ten rating on IMDb, so it’s not a total failure.
It didn’t get that much, did it? I’m shocked. I thought it’d get a -20. You should rent it. It’s very similar to Home Alone. It’s right up there with the classics.
Seth Green (Chris Griffin)
Mila Kunis said to ask about your run-in with the tabloids.
This only makes us sound stupid. Mila and I were at a club together, and both our significant others were out of town. So I kind of elected to take care of her—lead her through crowds, etcetera. At one point, we were going outside so she could smoke, and I had my arm around her. The second we clear the doorway, like 30 flashes went off. Two days later, there was something published like, “Her boyfriend [Macaulay Culkin] better watch out.” [Laughs] And the three of us thought it was really funny, so we decided to play it up a bit. Mila and I showed up at a bunch of events together and would dash down press lines just long enough so people could see us together. We also had this whole plan where her boyfriend and I were going to stage a public fight.
So what happened?
Nothing. [Laughs] Nobody bit. We tested the parameters of our celebrity, and we found ourselves coming up short. [Laughs again] It’s kinda nice. I’ve got all the perks of the average successful actor without all the real drama. I’ve found that comedians don’t really solicit that kind of attention.
Why do you think that is?
I think the tabloids cater to a high-school type of drama and the level of interest surrounding that. People are more inclined to gossip about the captain of the football team rather than the captain of the debate team. So…[Laughs]
Seth MacFarlane (Peter, Stewie and Brian Griffin)
This is from Seth Green: When are you going to get around to doing your Logan’s Run remake?
Oh boy, it is on my mind for hours every day. I saw The Island and, you know, I was as disappointed as the rest of the solar system. And I think it’s time to see that chicken done right. Seth Green used to live down the street from me, and it came up one night that he’d never seen Logan’s Run. And I said, “Come up the goddamn street right now.”
Has he since moved?
Yeah. He was the only neighbor that I knew. There’s nobody to loan me a cup of Lawry’s seasoning salt anymore.
Growing up, did your family have any long-running gags?
Yeah, there was a pair of underwear that a lady friend of my grandfather’s had left at our house one week. My mom and my cousin were sending it back and forth to each other, in clever ways, for ten years. One would bake it into a pie, the other would have it delivered UPS. It got so elaborate that I think at one point my mother broke into my cousin’s office in New York just to plant the underwear.
How do you want Peter Griffin to be remembered years from now?
As the guy who stuck a garden hose up Ann Coulter’s asshole.
The cast of Family Guy Live sits down Saturday 15.
