Ellis island

The filmed universe of Bret Easton Ellis is a magical place, where all the kids have Ray-Bans and Ferraris, and cocaine and group sex are as everyday as vitamin C. We realize that the Brat Pack author intends his novels as indictments of the rich and almost-famous of the 1980s. But on screen, hedonism—like combat—often looks more fun than it should. In honor of the release of The Informers, here’s a guide to movies based on Ellis’s books.

Less Than Zero (1987)
Premise Andrew McCarthy, on a break from an apparently useless sojourn in the Ivy League, returns home to bed his old flame (Jami Gertz) and get his best friend (Robert Downey Jr.) off the blow.
Redeeming quality Downey’s performance, which eerily presages his own troubles with addiction. It’s also interesting to look back on an era when Thomas Newman scores sounded like Tangerine Dream (as opposed to other Thomas Newman scores).
Sobering moment McCarthy and Gertz hold Downey’s head over a toilet during the withdrawal sequence. It may have been the high point of their careers.
Glib soundtrack selection trivializing major character’s death “Life Fades Away,” Roy Orbison, over the closing credits.
Classy dialogue “You don’t look happy.” “But do I look good?”
Lesson learned This is your brain; this is your brain on tedious message movies. Any questions?

American Psycho (2000)
Premise Christian Bale stars as an i-banker so assured of his mastery of the universe that he murders hobos, hookers and assorted others to satisfy his narcissism, abetted by the least inquisitive detective (Willem Dafoe) since Whoopi Goldberg in The Player.
Redeeming quality Crisp direction by Mary Harron mitigates the stupidity of said premise.
Sobering moment Bale delivers a possibly comical monologue in which he confesses to killing “20 people, maybe 40.”
Glib soundtrack selection trivializing minor character’s death “Hip to Be Square,” Huey Lewis and the News, played as Jared Leto takes an ax to the head.
Classy dialogue “He was into that whole Yale thing.” “What whole Yale thing?” “Well, he was probably a closet homosexual who did a lot of cocaine. That whole Yale thing.”
Lesson learned Easier to chase down a hooker with a chain saw than to get a same-day reservation in Chelsea. Just FYI.

The Rules of Attraction (2002)
Premise Four college kids grope their way toward maturity, going through the usual array of botched drug deals, virginity losses at the hands of aspiring porn directors, and dinners with Mom (Faye Dunaway).
Redeeming quality Roger Avary’s mise-en-scène is at least as hopped-up as these kids.
Sobering moment A hungover James Van Der Beek awakes to the sounds of a penis-enlargement commercial.
Glib soundtrack selection trivializing minor character’s death “Without You,” Harry Nilsson, during a bathtub suicide.
Classy dialogue “Since when does fucking somebody else mean that I’m not faithful to you?”
Lesson learned Owe drug money? Remind your dealer you’re on financial aid.

The Informers (2009)
Premise Assorted debauched types crisscross Los Angeles: A drug-addled rocker screws underage men and women; barely of-age kids screw each other; parents screw their kids’ friends; Mickey Rourke shows up to botch a kidnapping; and a mysterious virus rages through Beverly Hills. (It’s 1983.)
Redeeming quality Winona Ryder, who in the late ’80s might have played the ingenue role, cast against type as a news anchor.
Sobering moment Preppie Graham (Jon Foster) nonplussed to find his girlfriend (Amber Heard) participating in a foursome without him.
Glib soundtrack selection trivializing minor character’s death “Shadows of the Night,” Pat Benatar, the favorite song of a character killed in a car accident, played at his funeral. Friends immediately complain that he had lousy taste in music.
Classy dialogue “Wow, this isn’t just a thing. You actually…care about her.”
Lesson learned Threesomes, okay. Foursomes, not okay.

The Informers opens Friday.

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