The Women

English’s abysmal remake of the 1939 femme classic sucks all the venom and verve out of Clare Boothe Luce’s play and trades it for Oprah-lite homilies and group hugs. Updating the premise—a selfless moneyed wife (Ryan) finds out that her husband is cheating—the Murphy Brown creator favors lines like “How could I share myself with you if I didn’t know who I was?” over rapid-fire banter. Jokes about plastic surgery abound, which seem all the more cruel considering the difficulty Ryan has in making basic facial expressions apart from a ghastly trout pout. The DVD includes deleted scenes, interviews with the cast and crew about “issues of female empowerment” and a featurette about the 1939 version.